Sunday, August 29, 2010

My corn is gone...

My corn is dead, and my poopies just won't come. It's official: the Popanator is constipated. I tried shoving my fist up there, and found nothing. I tried shoving a broom up there, and my auger, and a garden hose, but it's like I've got nothing inside. I've never felt so wounded or so empty. Without my corn, it's like I'm not a full person anymore.
I sat on the toilet crying tears of blood – not from my eyes, but from mah asshole. It's like, without my beautiful, majestic corn, I'm like a mother without a child, or a poopie hole with no fists around. There is only one solution I can think of. I have to go visit my old friend the cow.
If anybody would know why this happened and who did it, it would be the cow. Cows know things, after all. One time, I even heard that you can read the future in the meadow muffins they leave. It's their special power and their gift to the world. My friend, I hope you can help me ease my corny hole…
Popanator's Store at Zazzle

2 comments:

Hodgenator said...

Oh... My... God...

Popanator said...

I know, Hodgenator. It was a big shock to me. But, I will get through it! I will poop again! I will enjoy corn again!