Sunday, August 14, 2011

Willie is all grown up!

Hey, everybody. Your old pal Popanator is a little bummed right now, and not "bum" like poopy hole either. See, I just found out yesterday that my autistic brother Willie had himself a girlfriend. I never even met her until I found out that they'd eloped and moved off together. I know he's technically a little older than I am, but I've always felt like his big sister and the guardian of his poopy hole. Between this and having that crazy boy get promoted, I don't know what to think lately. Your pal the Popanator is just a little depressed.

I mean, who am I going to chase around the house when he starts running around doing that "fire alarm" thing autistics like to do every so often? When we were kids I used to pretend there really was a fire and drag the hose into the house to put it out when he'd do that. Later in life I matured into putting a tube up my shit hole and just spraying diarrhea everywhere. Oh, the memories. At least he's happy, I guess. Since he's older I can't really complain that he got married first, and I really do want what's best for Willie.

I just wish I'd gotten to meet this girl first. I barely know anything about her. One day she came to the door and I honestly thought she was selling something. I'd just invested a lot of my poopies into a venture I'm keeping a secret for now, so I wasn't sure if I'd be able to produce a suitable payment for whatever it was. But then she said her name was Cheri and she was Willie's wife -- and I had to admit she had a nice rock on her finger.

After I picked my jaw up off the floor I called Willie into the front room, and the way he leaped into her arms was both surprisingly agile for an autistic and something I'd never thought possible. Normally he's all weird about touching anybody, but the way he snuggled up into her chest and said "Murr" was total, true asspie love. I was also impressed by how strong she was. Willie's not a small guy, but Cheri held him up like... uh, something that's really easy to hold up.

Then he just moved out, like he was going to the store or something. And I'm sad. I guess I can share my poopies with Jay, but... it's just not the same. I want my brother back!!!!!!!1!!!!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Willie Discovers Spiders!

Hey guys, it's Willie again. I guess Poppy told you guys that I got promoted, and that's cool. I like being able to do something for money that doesn't involve selling a piece of my ass or collecting rents from anybody. Collecting of any kind is not that much fun, 'cause I'm heterosexual by nature. Of course, there are times when I enjoy a little ass action, maybe asstion or something? I don't know. I don't get that deep into it all, but I do know I did something kinda funny with my ass the other day.

I guess Poppy goes on and on to you guys about how she's always fisting shit holes, whether it's her own or anybody else's who gets in her path. If she can fist a shit hole, she pretty much does. It's damn annoying living and working with somebody who's always trying to fist everybody. I'm glad I'm not her boss, or I would've had to put a stop to that all the time. But whatever- back to what I did with my ass. Don't worry, everybody, it doesn't involve any fisting. My ass is exit only unless it's a desperate financial situation.

See, I was wipin' the other day, as I typically do after taking a shit, and I saw this spider on the wall. It was a tiny little thing and I hate spiders, so I took the tp and just squashed it. Now, I'm not one for wasting things, so I went ahead and wiped my ass with the spider paper. And that gave me an idea...

I went on down to the pet shop and bought one of those spiders that's the size of a dinner plate, all nice and hairy. They call it a goliath tarantula, but I didn't plan to hit it with stones. I took that boy home and started wipin' my ass with him like he was half a roll of tp. You should've seen that thing scurry around, all shitty and spidery. It's nice to hold some dominion over an animal sometimes.

Thing about the spider is, I liked how his little tiny hairs really scraped lots of shit out of my crack. His thorax was the perfect shape to just slip right through there, and I think what they say about spiders releasing a chemical irritant is overstated, because it felt kinda nice. It even gave me a nice scratch across my taint, so ooh baby. Best $20 I've spent in years. Of course, it's a good thing I got a raise with my promotion.

Maybe next I'll duct tape him to a frisbee.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

My Favourite Ceral

Here is a video of my favourite ceral! Poopie coco puffs! Mmmm..... Poopies are the best for breakfast lunch and dinner!

Monday, August 1, 2011

Jay The Model Christian

Hey poopy pals. It's your old pal the Popanator again. I was talking to my new BFF Jay again, and he was telling me about how much of a good Christian he is. Normally I think religions are just stuffy ways people can feel like they're better than everybody else, but Jay's views on life are kinda neat. He told me that he loves his fellow man, and I smiled and said, "in every position there is." He's also got a cute little poop fetish just like I do. Matter of fact, if Jay wasn't gay I think I'd like to marry him. He could be my little house wife.

I could just see that. Jay told me how he loves to be with Uncle Tony. He squats down and rides uncle Tony's cock, and then when they both spurt he likes to let their love juices just leek out of his poopy hole. If there's anything sweeter than shit it's got to be the cum of someone you really love. Jay was telling me all about how much he loves mah uncle. While he still goes around and sleeps with other guys, he really does love uncle Tony and considers him one of his best pieces.

See, to Jay all the men he has sex with are pieces of dick, or pieces for short. Every piece knows that if they don't like how Jay treats them, they can be replaced like a snap of his fingers. He has such a power over these guys, and I'd love to have that kind of power. I'm training my poopy hole's inner power under Jay the way a young ninja would train under a king shit ninja or something. One day I hope to be the kind of powerful, sexy poop fetish bitch like Jay is. It's such an amazing rush to feel like I'm sucking the energy out of a man and making him addicted to me.

I bet you are. Kisses everybody!!!!!1!!!!