Sunday, July 28, 2013

Is the Golden Age of trolls and lolcows over???

Hi, shiz bisques! Still alive and getting down Pancake Style! That is where you fuck someone up the ass while they are going poopies at the same time. Then, while you are fucking them, the poopies get all smashed and it looks like pancake batter. YUM!

Okay, I was hanging out with some fans on Saturday. These were assorted people who I used to hang with a the psych ward. I was asked about my lack of content. If you look around, not many trolls or lolcows are producing any new content. I don't know, if it is just a lack of ideas, or just a lack of motivation. There really isn't many major LOLcows/trolls anymore.

The only one I can think of at the moment that is active is Nick Bate. Poppy loves you! :) He's my brother from a different mother! I mean, his love of poopies and playing with them matches mine.



Okay, besides the new up and coming star of the interwebs, look at pretty much everyone else who was awesome. They all seem to start up in 2009, get noticed HARDCORE in 2010, start fizzling in 2011, hit rock bottom in 2012, and well, are once again nobodies in 2013. WTF happened?! I'll venture some guesses:

Christian Weston Chandler:

This was the LOLcow to end all LOLcows. The ultimate face of Autism. Autism=Chris. The Golden Age of Chris was the 2009-2010 era with all the cool videos for his troll girlfriends. He was funny and entertaining. In 2011, he decided to take it to the next level by doing his TomGirl shit. However, it ended up being an aborted story arc, when he had to end that saga. Chrissy did was every Autistic male does in their life and that is commit a violent crime and play victim and say that the victim was attacking them. Due to his probation there has been no new content since August 2011. Even though he did play the Autism card like all violent Autistic males, he still didn't get off scott free.

However, with Chrissy's cult following he can start up all over again. Seriously, there are still followers out there waiting for new content, fapping furiously fantasizing about it. My theory is, he's just too fucking lazy to capitalize on his celebrity. If I was that famous, I WOULD BE MAKING FUCKING MONEY OFF OF IT. Okay, I'll shut up about that. I'm just yelling into a void.



Christopher Paul Whitney:

Chris is a good name of a turd, or an lolcow. Seriously, a lot of those Autistic fucks are named that. However, he was smarter than Christian Weston Chandler. He also had very entertaining videos, but he charged donations for people to view them. Meaning, HE MADE MONEY off of it. However, where he fucked up is, he kept retiring. After you retire so many times, people lose interest. I even up losing interest in early 2012. He just couldn't do a good enough come back and even when he tried, he would just retire again.



John Assanti:

I love the shit out of him. I would so do him Pancake Style. He made funnier than shit YouTube videos and was even still going strong in 2012. As LOLcows go, he is the king. However, instead of being an Asspie nutjob, he was an Oxycodone addict. Also, possibly bi-polar. He did try to straighten up his life and lose weight (from what I know he still is) in 2012. That was the end of Fatboygetdown and all the degrading videos. He did lose a bunch of weight from what I heard, however, ended up in bad health. Being an overweight drug addict is not a good thing. I still hope the best for him and hopefully, he can make a comeback that doesn't involve doing something degrading.



Popanator:

Okay, I still get this asked what the hell happened from people who know I am the Popanator. I kind of left everyone hanging after the baby daddy saga. I hate to leave everyone with an aborted story arc. However, I admit, the inspiration and content have been low lately. I know, I suck. However, even though I love and adore poo, and I am still obsessed with it, I still have an outside life, job, psychiatric counseling, and all that shiz. Maybe I'll make a comeback, I don't know. I know, I can't let the Popanator side of me die completely. I will always be a troll in one way or another. Whether it is out and out blatant poo loving trolling, or even subtle trolling, which I have been doing lately, I can't get the troll out.

Also, Popanator is a reminder of a simpler time. A time when the lulz were in abundance.

Fake Popanator:

Where the fuck did he go?! I missed his retarded comedy. I guess, when my posts slowed so did his.



Okay, we all know what we have to do. We either need good trolls/lolcows to spring up and replace the dried up husks of the previous ones, or those dried up husks need to make a comeback. We need more lulz on the internet. Come on, how hard is it? I'm the only one out of the bunch that actually has a job or life. We need inspiration. Is it just me, or is humor seriously lacking from the internet now??!





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